“Spring, an experience in immortality.”~ Henry D. Thoreau
The quality of the rest of your life and your partner’s life will be what you want it to be—the decisions are yours and your partner’s to make. If you both agree that you want is “to let the sun shine in” on a shared positive perspective, you will each strengthen your immune systems; when Life’s inevitable pop quizzes come up, you will both be ready to get an “A.”
If you are a married couple, at some point along the way, you will hear everyone from your mother-in-law (usually on the eve of your wedding day), to a therapist who is helping you through Couple’s Therapy sometime later in your marriage, say, “…good marriages take a lot of work.” I prefer to say that “…along the way, spouses have chances to grow even closer as they create positive solutions to the challenges that come to us all.” I don’t want to make being married sound like a 9-to-5 job by describing it as work.
Here are some suggestions for keeping the romance and heartfelt understanding in your marriage instead of likening marriage to the workplace.
- Get at least one meditation CD. If neither of you have learned meditation techniques, get a “CD for Beginners,” and after mastering that, you can then move on to a more advanced meditation CD, if you wish.
- Get at least one guided imagery CD and use it together. Focus on what each of you loves about life—and then do those things. For example, if the guide on the CD asks you to think of a place you love and that makes you feel the most relaxed, both of you will want to agree on whether it is at the beach or in the forest. If you like them both, decide together which one you will use for this CD, then if you decide to try another guided imagery CD (sometimes called “creative visualization” or just “visualization”), you can use the other image.
- Learn the art of massage using healing aromas; this is even more effective if, while you are massaging each other’s neck, shoulders, legs, and feet, you can also talk about beautiful visions of life that you both share like the waves at an ocean beach, the towering trees of the forest, etc., while you are massaging neck, shoulders, legs, and feet.
- I believe we sleep to rest and communicate with that part of our brain that is responsible for intuitive wisdom, so make sure your partner’s sleep and your own sleep is restorative. Before sleep of any kind, including naps, or at bedtime, have a ritual of saying some affirmations about gratitude and loving your life together just as it is in the present; you can also say affirmations that any dreams that come during sleep will be beautiful, positive, and/or answers to your questions and concerns.
- Use affirmations to help you create a quality of life that is loving, positive, and beautiful.
I wish you all a joyous Springtime.
Bernie Siegel, MD is the author of many best-selling books including Love, Medicine & Miracle: Lessons Learned about Self-Healing from a Surgeon's Experience with Exceptional Patients and more recently, 101 Exercises for the Soul: Divine Workout Plan for Mind, Body and Spirit. Dr. Siegel is best known for his work on patient empowerment including the right to live powerfully and die peacefully. In May 2011, Dr. Siegel was honored by the Watkins Review of London as one of the Top 20 Spiritually Influential Living People on the Planet